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Announcements as Chinese water torture
Ouch, ouch, and ha! That was my reaction to reading a recent diatribe about church growth from one website. His initial thought was:
If church sucks, people don’t invite others. They don’t think “Man, my friends have got to be here for this!” They think “Well, I might as well keep going here.”
Included in his list are things like:
- Stop preaching crappy sermons.
- Quit acting like such a fruit up there.
- They’re supposed to be announcements, not Chinese water torture.
I think the list could also be titled “Church Growth Thoughts from the Pews.” I know of several folks in our group who would be that honest. Thanks to Todd for first mentioning it.




that dude was pretty cranky, but he was funny… and accurate!
Wow, lol! Sometimes I worry that I’m too critical of church, but after reading the list, I think i’m pretty nice!
Some of them were very true.
There is a song that the A/G is in love with called Spirit of The Sovereign Lord. I hate it. Not only is the music creepy but the lyrics quote a passage in like, Isaiah that was specifically for that time period. “This is the year of the favor of the lord, this is the year of the vengeance of our God.”
lol, thanks for letting me rant.
ooh, can I add one? I’m not aiming this one at anyone, I’m just making a general statement:
9. Stop using abstract, vague cliches that don’t mean anything.
a) “get on fire for God” huh?
b)”Let’s pray for revival” what does that even mean?
c)”I plead the blood of Jesus over (insert noun)” Double huh?
This only scratches the surface.
Those are pretty good… any more of you got some?